Growth

I wrote in yesterday’s entry how some things never die, how old heartaches can take us by surprise and leave us feeling things we haven’t felt, perhaps, in decades.

They can make us feel like we’re walking old paths we thought we’d left behind. The paths may, indeed, be behind us, but their ramifications are not.

Despite current trends in contemporary Christian thinking, I don’t believe we ever reach a place where we we’re completely healed (note the word, “completely”) in this lifetime (note the phrase, “in this lifetime”) of the emotions we experience in reaction to our wounds, whatever they are.

If anything, it seems to me, honest grief over consequences of living in a fallen world should be our natural response (as believers) to these things. It’s healthy. It’s biblical. It’s what Jesus did when he wept for the lostness of Jerusalem.

We weep for our fallenness and the fallenness of those around us. We weep for what was, and perhaps is, but never should have been.

And we’ll continue to grieve as we recall those things throughout our lifetimes.

But we don’t grieve as the world grieves. We grieve, but never without hope:

hope of redemption
hope in that “one day” when there will be no more sin or death or shame.
hope in God’s sovereign ability to use all things for His glory
hope that this life isn’t all there is
hope that pain and suffering are not without purpose
hope that pain and suffering will end
hope that our brokenness will one day be restored
hope that we will be made whole- that is, completely whole – one day.

But not yet.

It shouldn’t surprise me, then, that Ive been feeling what I’ve been feeling. It’s part of life here and now. I’m even okay with it (admittedly, not without discomfort and a few inner protests).

I’m even encouraged. Though I’m dealing with old issues, I’ve grown that much more since the last time I dealt with them. I’m handling them even better now. And next time – and for sure there will be a next time – I’ll have that much more growth behind me.

Such is the process of sanctification. Already…but not yet.

So I face the same issues over and over again, but with each passing season I come at them from a position of added growth, deeper maturity, and greater reliance on and trust in the God who reigns.

And the wounds that drove me to Jesus nearly 30 years ago are the very same wounds that make me long for Him even more today.

Those are wounds I can live with. Even for a lifetime.

And I suspect I’ll be living with them for the rest of my earthly days.

But not forever. )

Come quickly, Lord.

‘Til next time,
Joan